What’s The Cooch Gobbler Combo & How Do I Give My Girlfriend One?

Don’t get a bad dick review by failing with your tongue.

In a prior post, we covered what is the Gluck Gluck 9000 is. If you want to know, you’ll just have to check that post out. If you read that post, you’ll learn that one of the best ways to get better blow jobs is to give better head yourself. The equivalent of that for women is the Cooch Gobbler Combo.

It’s like the golden rule.

If you want better sex for yourself, step one is wanting better sex for her. One of our problems as men with sex is that we only focus on whether we get off and how we nut. I can assure you that if the sex is lackluster for her than you’re the only person concerned about that and ideally, imagine how much better blowing a load would be if your girlfriend gave a damn about it, too. Want her to give more of a shit about your enjoyment getting off? You have to consider her own enjoyment of having a female orgasm.

So take notes because there’s a good chance you think you’re a helluva lot better at eating pussy than you think you are. This information is straight from a women’s mouth – you can check out the podcast above if you don’t trust me. And, I put these tips into use in my own bedroom. 10/10 – my girlfriend approves.

I know in the prior article, I told you the best way to get a Gluck Gluck 9000 was through communication to her and that she wasn’t magically going to read your mind. But now is your chance to surprise her with the best fine dining between her legs she has ever experienced.

What is the Cooch Gobbler Combo?

Made famous by “Call Her Daddy” podcast, the Cooch Gobbler Combo is the most amazing pussy eating a girl can experience. It is you being fucking zoned in on every area around her vulva (go back to anatomy if you think her entire crotch is her vagina), your tongue massaging each labia, your fingers massaging her G-Spot inside her vagina, and you humming, sucking, and licking the ever-living shit out of her clit.

You’re going to give your girl cunnilingus worthy of a lesbian porno.

So how do you do it?

You start by going slow and teasing your way to her clitoris. What a lot of guys get wrong is that they just go in for the kill. One second you’re pulling down her polka dot panties and the next second your flicking her bean with your tongue – you gotta slow down buddy! Girls need a little more time and patience for maximum o-face potential.

So kiss her inner thighs while massaging your hands along her outer thighs. Then work your tongue along the labia, spending plenty of time getting her aroused through teasing before actually making your way to her clit.

Once you’re at that point, according to the “Call Her Daddy” girls, you’re going to lick the clit in a figure-eight motion.

But wait, there’s more!!!!

Here’s why it is the Cooch Gobbler Combo and not just a Cooch Gobbler. You’re going to stop jerking yourself off for a minute while your head is between her legs and learn to multi-task, bruh. Use your fingers in a come hither motion while slurping her clit and massage her breasts with others.

Give her the performance of a lifetime.

And then you’re going to do something shamelessly.

You’re going to hum. That’s right. If you want to perform a legit, by the book cooch gobbler combo, you have to incorporate humming your lips in a vibrating motion to simulate the vibrator she will no longer need when you’re working your magic.

Do you know how you want her to suck your balls dry with slobber all over her face? Do that, but for her. Show her a good time, show her that you’re enjoying pleasing her and I can assure you she will be doing all she can to aim to please you back! If you want to get toe-curling hummers, then you have to eat tacos at the “Y” with passion.

Don’t forget to read up on the Gluck Gluck 9000.

Good luck and have fun!

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Hi, I spewed out all the shit you just read! I like long walks on the beach (but I'm mostly surrounded by cornfields), challenging the status quo of the dating scene, fucking all the rules of dating and encouraging men to live their best life. When I'm not trying to keep the lights on around here and raise two little girls, you can find me drinking and partying - you know the key Wallstreet success...ballin'.

164 thoughts on “What’s The Cooch Gobbler Combo & How Do I Give My Girlfriend One?

  • February 6, 2020 at 10:21 pm

    Haha! I love Call her Daddy! Thank you for going into detail on the Cooch Gobler ???

    • February 7, 2020 at 4:41 pm

      So, what you’re saying is you know what the Gluck Gluck 9000 is. I just became a big Dezie fan.


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